Quarter-life Crisis

I am nearly 20 years old, and I usually hate my life.

Why? Honestly, I'm not quite sure. I guess because I feel like I'm boring. I don't really do anything besides work and school, I only speak when spoken to, I do as I'm told. I never really made my own identity, I just follow along (not willingly of course, just look back at my last few bloggs, one of them is about me wanting to have an identity separate from my brothers) and try to stay out of trouble.

When? For a few years now honestly, but it really struck me hard whenever I started college last year and realized just how sheltered and boring I really was.

I've considered trying more dangerous things, challenging my concept of me, trying to break out of the mask others created for me. I've thought about drinking and/or smoking (still haven't done either), I've thought about trying to be more outgoing and maybe getting a girlfriend (just thought again), I've even considered joining the military (I'm too lazy though, and let's be honest, I don't exactly have the physique for that), but usually those sort of thoughts end as just that. Thoughts.

I'm not sure if this sort of thing is common, but I do know that Mid-Life-Crises are very common, and John Updike's "Separating" is about one man getting a divorce because of his Mid-Life-Crisis.

I've tried talking to people about it, but usually I either get laughed at (apparently I joke a lot) or I get told I'm being too dramatic, so if this is more than just my own feelings, I'd appreciate someone getting back to me on that.